Its so cold!!

Its so cold all the time. I don't know if the natural temperature drop is being made worse by my recent weight loss (bye bye warming fat) and blood loss due to various medical and surgical procedures. Or maybe I'm just getting old...ugh! Though primarily, it may be because I'm not doing anything except vegging inside the house (necessary for now as I just had surgery last Saturday). Whatever be the reason...its freezing!

The strange thing is I used to like winter. I liked the crisp winds, the warmth of the sun on winter afternoons and cuddling up under quilts at night. No more...all that is still there....but I just can't seem to get warm anymore. My feet are always freezing, the heaters don't seem to work. I'm just cold cold cold all the time. God I can't wait for summer!!

Resolutions for 2010

2009 was a bad year for me, health-wise, and I spent most of it in hospitals or bed rest. But I have high hopes from 2010. Since I will be recovering from my run of bad medical luck, I've decided to take 2010 really really easy. Focus areas:

Body: Maintain weight, try and tone up muscles

- Diet: Fat restricted diet, necessitated by gall bladder removal, and anyway good for me

- Exercise: Walk my dog Nero every evening. Restart 30-min stretching regime

- Sleep: Correct sleeping pattern and duration

Mind:

- New Skill: Learning to play the keyboard and read music

- Travel: Broaden my mind! At least one holiday to foreign lands

Emotion:

- Stop being a recluse. Go out more.

And above all, start living and enjoying life, instead of moping in hiding about all the things that have been going wrong with me.

Twilight Series and Romance

Recently, I picked up the Twilight Series by Stephanie Meyer. And suddenly, I'm a hooked rabid fan! Its not like I haven't read paranormal romances before. So I'm wondering what it is about this series that won't stop enthralling me! I bought, read and re-read all the books. I've seen both the movies. I trawl the internet regularly looking for stuff about it. I'm both shocked and fascinated by my own obsession.

This happens to me sometimes. I see or read something and get caught up and somewhat obsessed. But it normally runs out it course and I move to the next thing. But the Twilight saga refuses to diminish in fascination!

I guess its the age old good-girl reforms bad-boy alpha-male rake. Add to that high-school, the time of endless possibilities, straddling adulthood and innocence, when emotions seem so more more intense and everything so much more exciting. Its so easy to escape into that world of being cool, being newly in love and the first tastes of independence.

I love the character of Edward Cullen, his intensity, his passion, and his...well...superiority in most things. And I wondered what draws me to him. In real life, I love my hubby, I hate being without him...ten years and nothing has taken away the rightness of being together. Edward is like the embodiment of all fantasies...light and dark at the same time. I've read so many romance novels...but all the heroes remain in fantasy. Edward's character, is a rare case, of wanting me to break out of fantasy...and actually be that girl in his school.

And then, I thought back to my first days with my now hubby...and I saw what appealed. The desperation of forbidden love, the wonder of finding mr right, the intensity and the passion...not a slow build..but a high that refuses to diminish. Edward takes me back to that time. Not that we love each other less today, but this is a more mature love. Twilight gives me a conduit to go back in time and relive the first blush of a lifetime of love. A time when we didn't take our love for granted and it was more like a live grenade than a comfortable blanket.

You can't live with live grenades...but they sure light up your life! And then you can cuddle up into your comfortable blanket, and dream.

I don't think my hubby gets it...maybe its just a female thing. But he bought me all the books, and took me to all the movies (without cringing!). He got me the music and smuggled in a rose when I was in hospital last week. He will always be my Edward Cullen...though Rpattz sure is more eye candy! :)